2024: A year of hidden joys
From one year to the next, He is faithful
It is that time of year again when I get nostalgic for what was, and also look ahead to what will be. I started writing this draft at the end of 2024, and here I am in the earliest days of 2025 finishing it up!
I was reviewing how many times I wrote something for my dear Substack this past year (six) and I felt kind of disappointed in myself. And I thought about all the things that I got to experience this year — the good, the bad, and the ugly — and I wonder why I didn’t write more. But as I shared close to the beginning of this year, the word that the Lord spoke into my life for 2024 was “hidden”—for reasons that were, you guessed it, hidden to me. And I feel like for everything that went “wrong”, there were also many things that went “well”. In fact, despite the frustrating fact that I may never understand why things happened the way that they did, I can sit with peace knowing that nothing is outside of the Lord’s providence.
And so, from the start of this year to the present, I wanted to share some of the divine appointments that the Lord made with me.
I went back to school, briefly. After being away in the convent and before I started looking for work in earnest, I had the opportunity to get back into the classroom virtually, work through an accelerated 8-week digital marketing certificate, and learn some new things. I was scared to get back into study mode because it had been a few years since I graduated. The course was fast, and the material felt overwhelming at times. There were even moments where I wondered why I was spending money I didn’t have. But with a lot of encouragement, I pushed through — and I do believe that the course helped to pave the way for what would come later on in the year.
I had a pretty horrible job. They say that everything happens for a reason. I won’t go into specifics, but for two months, it was pretty rough. During this time I was really challenged to trust that the Lord was doing something good when it was completely hidden from me. I’m not suggesting that He gave me two months of difficulty and challenge, but in hindsight, the two months were exactly what I needed in order for things in His perfect timing to line up…
…because after this job, I landed at a really beautiful job. When I say God’s timing is perfect, there is no way for me to adequately express just how perfect it is. I was unemployed all of two weeks before I landed at my current position with the Archdiocese of Vancouver, doing work that I love and serving the local Church. It has challenged me both professionally and spiritually, and more importantly, I know that this placement was intentional. I needed a place where Christ was at the centre, because I had been floating along for a few months. I needed to be around people who also loved Jesus, who were steadfast in their faith and the mission, and who would challenge me to grow not only as a professional, but as a daughter of the Lord.
I went on pilgrimage to South Korea. Shortly after coming home from the convent, I took a leap of faith and decided, one year in advance, to go on a pilgrimage to South Korea. I was pinching myself as the plane was landing in Seoul. I still feel like I’m pondering the many graces and lessons that I learned while I was there (like this one), but above all, I felt the Lord really break open my heart even more for something I’ve always been passionate about, which is diversity in the Church. I can’t tell you how powerful it was to read about so many saints who look more like me than most other ones I’ve read about. Though I’m not Korean by heritage, my experience in Korea opened me up to the Asian Catholic Church in a way that I hadn’t experienced here in Vancouver. More than that, hearing about the immense sacrifice that these martyrs did out of their love for Jesus really brought me pause and reflection — do I love Christ with that amount of deep abandon?
Aside from the spiritual formation and nourishment that occurred, I can’t forget the beautiful friendships that came about through the pilgrimage, the sightseeing, and of course, all the amazing Korean food!
I had my heart broken. Nothing more to say about that. The Lord hid a few things from me here, undoubtedly because He is trying to protect me, and it’s frustrating when I’m unable to understand. But again, I have to believe that He’s making space for something new.
I got back into speaking. I had the blessing of speaking at the Women of Dignity Conference in St. Albert, Alberta this past October, and even though this wasn’t my first speaking gig I was incredibly nervous. And yet, the Lord invited me to share a different story with these women, ranging from 13 to 85 years old — one that was still fresh and tender. But being present during this conference, in spite of heart ache, taught me so much. The biggest thing I learned was that when we show up for God, He shows up even more. When we let Him speak through us, powerful things happen.
These are just snippets of the past year with the Lord. In this coming year, He’s put two words on my heart, both of which are somewhat related and yet have their own unique meanings: renew and restore.
I find it frustrating sometimes when I don’t understand what’s going on. I’m not an expert on this yet, but I’m grateful for how the Lord taught me a lot about myself and about Him in the hidden nature of things. It’s been an invitation to grow in trust, especially when things don’t make sense. And now, with 2025 off to a start, I feel Him inviting me to be renewed and restored in that trust. He’s inviting me to greater restoration, with Him at the centre.
Wherever this finds you, I hope that your year ahead is filled with light, love, joy, and peace. Thank you as always for being encouraging and faithful readers to this newsletter, and I really hope to write more. I know I always say that, so this year, I’m renewing my vow to spend more time writing and praising the Lord in the big and small ways.
Happy New Year! And God bless you always,
Rachel
Keep writing, Rachel. This was very moving.